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When most people hear this statement, they'll either raise a skeptical
brow or laugh. They don't believe it, it's simply not a possibility
in their minds. Nor do they think they have permission to do
such a thing. What their future holds is not in their hands.
Instead, they wait and hope. Someday, they say, the answer will
come.
Do you have a clear direction for you future, one that you'll
know will bring long-term fulfillment? If not, how much of your
life are you willing to gamble while waiting for something to
happen?
A lawyer in her mid 40s recently revealed that she has been
asking the wrong question her whole life. Rather than ask, "What
do I want to be when I grow up," she's now asking, "What
can I invent myself to be?" The former question left her
life direction to the hands of fate and circumstance. She had
taken job offers that came along without much thought; she felt
her life was "happening" to her. In telling her story
she remembered how her initial choice to be a lawyer was at
13 years old. Her Sunday school teacher was a lawyer whom she greatly
admired and wanted to be like when she grew up. It was there,
at the tender age of 13 that she set her life direction without
much more thought than most of us put into deciding what wear
on any given day. This pattern of decision making continued throughout
her career, from one law firm to another, taking whatever job
happened to cross her path. Along this roller coaster she had
a mix of positive and negative work experiences, that by trial
and error, began to reveal that she was very good at parts of
her job, but terrible at most of it. She lost confidence in herself
by trying to excel in a field that didn't fit, and even got physically
ill. After 20 years of climbing the beanstalk in search of the
golden egg, she quit her job to "invent" her life direction.
With variations on a theme, this story is very common. More
often than not, people wake up one day in their late 30s or
40s, bedazzled as to how they went for so long without a clear
sense of direction for their life. Some took a stab in the dark,
others based their direction on how good they were in high school
math and science, and many followed in their families' footsteps,
while others based their decisions on security and a guarantee
for comfort. Whatever the reason, the underlying belief that
"keeps" many people moving into their future with no
hands on the steering wheel is the hope that things will work
themselves out. On rare occasion answers magically come--are
you willing to live with the odds that random events will show
you the way? Indeed, some of the answers to our career questions
require inner reflection, and some require exploration of the
outside world. There's a third way to answer life's tougher questions.
Why do so many people hand their life direction to fate? Actually,
most people would rather not leave things to chance. The problem
is not they lack intention, they really do want to live purposefully.
Their "philosophy" of how to get what they want is
the dilemma. Hoping things will work themselves out is the default
setting; a belief handed down from ancient civilizations when
people really were powerless. I've worked with over a thousand
people who've said that they have been trying to find their way,
with the secret "hope" the answer will magically dawn
on them. Most have had little success using this age-old theory.
They've read the self-help books, gleaned clues from their childhood,
and learned from their work experiences about what they are good
at doing. Still, most have trouble pinpointing what they would
really love to do. These are smart people; many of them have
a graduate education. As Einstein brilliantly found, you can't
solve a problem by using the same rules that created that problem.
If you've applied the rule, "life will work itself out"
in making important choices for your life, then reapplying this
rule to improve your life will likely not bring new results.
Well, I'll say it--things usually don't work themselves out
when it comes to choosing your life direction. Do a reality check
on this claim. Ask older people around you how long they've been
waiting for answers. In light of Einstein's genius insight, here's
a new rule to try on for size: "There's nothing to find,
there are no answers waiting for you." You can keep hoping
for clarity, or . . . you can rewrite your default setting to
"invent" your future, then set out to make it real.
If you're up for the challenge of living a fabulously fulfilling
life, a congratulations is in order. It will take a lot of courage
and a stick-to-it attitude to go against the social pressures
and expectations to settle for a "good" living. Even
today, living fully and loving your work is viewed as a privilege,
not a choice. The good news is that 21st century America is one
of the few places and times in the history of the world where
inventing a customized future is possible. Here's how to get
started.
There are a few important elements to consider when designing
your future. Rather than guess at a career title and ponder whether
it fits, it's much easier to piece smaller components of a career
together, like building a jigsaw puzzle. For example, if you
ask, "Should I be a doctor?" you'll likely get stumped.
Think in smaller chunks. Instead, ask whether you have natural
talents at spatial thinking and problem solving, most doctors
think mechanically when they're diagnosing the human body. As
well, check to see if you have a fascination with understanding
the human anatomy, and find it personally meaningful to heal
people. And thirdly, ask if you would enjoy the daily atmosphere
and culture of a doctor's office--do you fancy wearing a long
white smock, blood and needles, sick people?
In this fashion, the three biggest components of the career
puzzle to consider are your natural talents, personal meaning,
and workplace ecology. I highly recommend making commitments
(your requirements) in all three components independently, then
design several career possibilities that combine them. Each commitment
is a "must have" for your future. In other words, a
commitment is a personal promise, something you are willing to
make happen.
To begin this process, set up a project to inquire into each
of the following aspects of your life. The goal is to come up
with a list of requirements that can be pieced together to become
the life you are willing to stretch for.
Natural Talent - Squirrels were born to climb trees, ducks are natural Olympic
swimmers, and dogs are geniuses at smelling thousands of aromas.
Humans too, have very different natural talents. Each of us has
a unique "fingerprint" profile of talents and personality.
If you're not using your natural talents, then whatever you do
will probably feel like "work!" For example, imagine
that throughout the animal kingdom it was declared that the best
careers were up in the trees. Can you picture an all the different
animals trying to excel up there? If your work is not coming
naturally, then there's a good chance that your innate talents
are not a perfect fit with your career. You could be as misfit
as an elephant up a tree. Designing your innate ability and personality
into your career is extremely important, and the first step toward
long-term satisfaction. State-of-the-art testing
is available to help you with this.
Meaning and Purpose
- Once you commit to using your inborn talent, the next step
is to decide if your work must be meaningful to you. If so, what
topics do you find most meaningful? Only you can answer this
question. Notice the world around you, what moves and inspires
you? Is there an issue or need that you would love to aim your
talents at solving? If you have talents at creative problem solving,
then what problems would be more meaningful to you? For example,
medicine, architecture, IT, and physics are all spatial fields,
yet each have very a different impact on the world. Albert Einstein
and Frank Lloyd Wright had similar natural talents, they were
spatial inventors, INTP personality types, and each applied these
innate abilities in physical domains. Why did Einstein choose
physics over architecture? Purpose guided his talents, he was deeply committed to
solving the physical mysteries of the universe.
Workplace Ecology
- I've met many brilliant people who say that nobody listens
to their great ideas at work. They have natural talent to see
problems that others don't notice, and feel compelled to fix
them. Yet, no one seems to care enough to implement their innovative
solutions. This dilemma often stems from a poor fit with the
workplace "ecology." Does your workplace environment
support what you do best? For example, imagine an acrobatic F16
fighter pilot trying to make a living flying for a commercial
airline. His gifts just wouldn't be appreciated when flying a
sky bus with 200 passengers through rolling maneuvers! In addition
to meeting your talent and purpose requirements, it's important
to design a workplace setting that will fit you well. Do you
want a big or small company, entrepreneurial or steady-state
culture, indoors or outdoors setting, quite or bustling office, flex
hours or 9-to-5, liberal or conservative coworkers, etc? A workplace
ecology that supports your talents, purpose, personality, and
even your personal quirks is the best way to reduce the stress
of daily living.
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